Raid night shenanigans!

 Ahoy!

WOOH!  Guess what!  It's farm night!  Yayyyyyyyyy.  Man.  I love farm nights.  You can just do stupid shit, and there's a 98% chance that it won't suck as bad as progression nights.  You get loots, it's easy because people know what the fuck is going on.  Yeah it's old content.  But hey, it's a good time to dick around with different things. 

Please ignore the fact that this Blood DK is dual wielding. KTHXBAI

You know what, I'm gonna go as a Blood DK tonight.  YEAH!  FUCK UNHOLY DK's.  Yeah, I said it.  Fuck them and their dumbass ghouls and gargoyles and shit.  Bone armor?  More like BONED armor am i rite?  I hate having to spec unholy.  Them and their snobby top raid dps capabilities.  Bullshit, I want to be mediocre!  HURRAH!  Who wants to see lots of Heart strikes!?  Cammaaaannnn.  Yeah, I'm doin it.  IT IS DONE.

Anyone else find this picture badass?  Cuz I do.

Ahhh.  Oh yeah.  I also got PEGGLE!  So Bejeweled is riding the bench for a bit.  I got a new hotness to burn the time we take sitting around giving out buffs.  Which is roughly 13 mins a pull on progression nights.  I've timed it.  Now I can duel with other people's balls, plink balls off of stuff, I can even make my balls more talented.  And then I'll play peggle.  Add this to the list of things I can do during raid to wipe us. 

Well to watch all the shenanigans just tune into my raid stream.  Raid starts at 9:00pm Pacific Standard Time.  You know the link: http://www.holynub.com/2010/02/more-holynub-raid-streams.html

 

I played WAR and I think I like it.

I hope WOW don't mind it.

Well... That's enough Katie Perry for now. But yes. I've dabbled in the realm of non-wow games. AGAIN. There be many reasons for this. Primarily, with the announcement of Wrath of the Lich King expansion this coming november, I have lost the need to play wow. Yes, I could grind more gear. But for what? So it can all become obsolete in two months? Nurf that, I'm gonna do something more constructive with my time.

SO IT BEGINS... AGAIN

Alrighty then. Lets see here. What's this now... After much clicking and d/ling and crap, I PLAY! HmmMmMm. Because I don't want to deal with the big box of stupid which comprise 90% of the alliance on WOW, I'm going to roll the bad guys. DESTRUCTION BIATCHES!

One noticable thing about WAR, they spell out the classes as soon as you pickum. For example, I am rolling this thing called a Zealot. It is a Healer. That's explicitly what it says as soon as you click on the avatar. And that's about it. I mean, it's got some Debuffing and buffing capabilities, but overall it's supposed to be a healer. Meh, I can deal with that. Holynub rides again!

Soooo.. Where the hell am I?

OK. I'll admit. I am seriously fucking lost in this game. I don't know my ass from a hole in the ground. See, this is what happens when you play one MMO for way to fucking long. You're not flexable. Can't adapt and "enhance" (Clicky noises) "enhance" (more clicky noises) "enhance" (clicky clicky). Ok, that's enough super troopers. So... I kind of run around and kill crap randomly. I right click and talk to all these NPCs and stuff. Get quests. Do things. I still don't feel 100% comfortable with my surroundings still. It's probably just the WOW talking still.

Boy it's dark in here...

War goes for the more "Lord of the Rings" style of environments. It's a lot darker, not as cartoony as WOW. Some people like that. Personally, I don't. As far as aesthetics go for MMOs. The less realistic, the better. I really do like WOW's contrast in areas. One area is significantly different than others. I can't say that I've explored all areas of WAR, but from what i've seen. Not too impressed.

Waaaaagggghhh!!

Alright. I suck at PVP. But goddamnit I like it. And this game. Whew... They r do some things right here. You can GRIND UP LEVELS doing pvp. FROM LEVEL 1! As soon as you make your character, you can queue yourself for "scenario" pvp. That's basically battlegrounds from wow. They have different scenarios for different levels. Not sure how it works for different levels. There will be more on this in the future once I figure out everything. Nextly, Grinding in PVP as a healer is NOT THAT BAD/GOOD. You can sit back and heal people, and the person you're healing basically beats on people. This gives both of you EXP. Now, if you're healing lots of people at the same time while they wail on people. YOU GET EXP FOR ALL OF IT! HOWEVER!!!! If your team is sucking hard and not doing any damage and just taking it up the butt. Yeah.. You get nothing. But it is kind've fun grinding out almost a full level just doing BG's.

Also, there are PVP rankings from 1 to.. I think 40. Basically it's a separate exp system. As you PVP more, you get what's known as "Renown." Renown is kind of like your PVP level. By increasing it, it allows you access to better pvp gear and also special talents. It's complicated. I'm not even that far along, so we'll just call it a black box of pvp stuff.

So here we go

Well, that's Holy's first heal into the new, maybe even exciting world of... Warhammer. Hmmm. Still gotta get over WOW. At least until the expansion.

NOM NOM NOM

As I am now sitting here, procrastinating. Not writing about how price discrimination is a viable option for profit maximizing firms in certain tourism industries. I get hungry. Which then leads to this. FOOD AND VIDEO GAMES.


Food has been in games for a very long time. IN THE BEGINNING... BACK WHEN NINTENDO ONLY MADE HANDHELDS... THERE WAS BACON. Wait what? Bacon? Yes, the crazy ass japanese made Game & Watch games. There was a bizzare little title known as Chef. Where you juggled various food objects in a pan. And.. that's all you did. Those were simple times. Kiddies today may know Game & Watch prominently from it's character in the depressingly popular Super Smash Brothers Brawl/Melee. Kids these days. Young whipper shnappers need to know their roots damnit! Anyway. This is the one of (if not THE)first time food was a central theme of a game.


Pac-man. Now there's a mother fucker that needs to go to weight watchers. Not saying that I'm any better, but come on. All that basard does is eat shit. He eats the little dots, which i assume taste a lot like marshmallows. He eats the fruits and pretzels and shit. Then he eats the fucking steroid dot thing and starts eating ghosts like they were fucking soylent green. Imagine justwalking around then this big fat fucking yellow guy is like "WAKA WAKA MOTHA FAKKA!" and tries to eat you. That's some fucked up shit.


Lets take a look at the most legendary food ever introduced. MUSHROOMS! Yeah, mario did it. He ate shrooms and was like, "Dude, I'm fricken HUGE." Mario was a very drugged out game. But we still love him anyway. We just don't ask the questions. We just sit here and DANA NA DUH NA NA! DUH! Dun dan dun da duhh da duh and what not.


Domino's Pizza had a game. Back when their mascot was this wierd fucker in a red suit. I think it was called a Noid or some shit like that? Now that I think about it. What the fuck did you do in that game? You like... Collected pepperoni slices or some crap like that. Wait... WAIT! Doing research on this stupid fuckin game. Here we go. God i love wikipedia. Ho ho ho... Way to go localization in the late 80's and early 90's. Just like Super Mario Bro's 2. It's like, HEY nobody in the US will care what this game is. Lets use something they do know and just call it something else. There we go. GG


Bubble boble. YEYAH. I fucking love this game. Little godzilla dinosaurs that shoot friendly bubles instead of fire. And they're going to go save the princess! Aww aren't they cute? SO CUDDLY WUDDLY! ... ... I think i grew a vagina for a second there. So you shoot bubbles to capture enemies. Then pop the bubbles and the enemies miraculously become food and gems! Holy goddamn soylent system bat man. But hey... Lets not care, cuz they're cutesie little cuddly... AHHHH GET THEM AWAY FROM ME!


Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater. Take a wild goddamn guess what you eat in this game? Welll.. Snakes would only be partially true. You can eat all sorts of wild life. Snake. Birds. Alligators. It's like playing an episode of Man vs. Wild. Get all Bear Grylls on that shit. Of course you can always eat your standard yellow block of "Ration." Which I think are goddamn delicious. I used to eat those all the time while I lived in japan. Just because it made me feel like solid snake. WHAT!? It's great fucking product placement people! Those guys at Calorie Mate got my demographic goddamnit.


Speaking of product placement. Just about every RPG under the goddamn sun has a type of Potion or some shit like that. Dose guys at Square-Enix. They know what to do. Fucking make a real life version of it and sell it during the launch of the new game! Final Fantasy XII launched along with Square-Enix's new "Potion" drink. If anyone's played FFXII, you can burn through a lot of potions playing that game. You know... I need to get my hands on some of that stuff. WHAT?! I'm sorry. But the thought of DRINKING ACTUAL POTION makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Of course there's a level of sadness right below that.


Of course, if you go a "Potion" you also need a Mana potion. Yeaahhhhhhh!!!! Inspired by world of warcraft and other MMORPGS, some guys thought it would be a god idea to make one of those crazy ass energy drinks and call it "Mana Potion." Now that's fuckin genius. I'd buy it. If they fucking shipped out to Hawaii those goddamn bastards! *RAAAAGGGGEEE* I'm oom out here. How r holy supposed to heal? STFU, I'm not going to stack spir and mp/5! Nurf dat! GIMMIE DAT POT! Srsly. EY! Christiansen, can you ship me down like a 12 pack? I pay you back... Sometime.... Maybe....


And finally, if you watched that wonderful video at the top of the article. I'm sorry. I love Team Fortress 2 soo goddamn much. The art style just makes me happy. And I love the videos they make. That item, is a real weapon you can use in TF2. You eat it, and you make that loud obnoxious NOM NOM NOM noise. And everyone in the game knows what you're doing. And it heals you too! NOM NOM NOM! Sandvich! It's probably the only reason I play the Heavy class right now is to try and get that SANDVICH! Just so i can be completely obnoxious and stand around and eat it while people are actually tryin to do stuff. NOM NOM NOM!


And that is just a SUPER tiny glimps at food in video games. Meng... I'm pretty hungry now.

How do we kill that which has no life?

This article has been floating around the net for the past week or so. If you don't want to click and read it, I'll sum it up. Final Fantasy XI has a Notorious Monster(NM) boss that a guild spent 18 hours trying to kill. Now, this is just for the boss fight alone. This isn't doing other trash pulls and what not. To give you a little idea of how NM's play out in FFXI, I give you a comic by Penny Arcade.



This event has drawn many comments from all facets of the gaming community. Most of which are people just saying that such an encounter is absurd. 18 hours is pretty unreasonable. However, I began to ponder a couple things while reading some of the other readers comments.

First off. Did anyone in that raid ever stop and think that maybe, JUUUUST MAYBE, there is some sort of gimmick to the fight that makes it doable? I mean, I know Asia is known for mega grindfests for games, but requiring people to work as a group for a single encounter over a marathons length of time sounds a little off. I mean, granted Square-Enix did do Final Fantasy XII with bosses that did take over 10 hours of gameplay to defeat. BUT! They at least had the decency to give you a save point right next to the boss so you could save while fighting.
I found this interesting post from petfoodalpha.com. The one part I'd like to point out is:

"... it has been deemed that the combative techniques for weakening these NMs are too difficult. As a result, some players have engaged these enemies using unanticipated methods which led to extended battle times."

This sets of an alarm in my head. Does that mean that this fight is a gimmick fight? Were people just too stupid to figure out how to debuff the boss in such a way that it would make it killable? Or was it that the way to weaken the boss was never explored/explained/occurred to anybody in the game?

If it was a lack of research, I don't really blame the players in FFXI. For example, World of Warcraft new instances and encounters get player tested and ravaged to all hell and back. Guilds sit in the same instance and wipe for nights at a time trying to figure out how to beat a certain encounter. Final Fantasy XI players aren't given as much of a luxury. A single wipe in FFXI is insanely unforgiving. Chances are you'll de-level and you'll have to grind your way back to cap before you can attempt a boss again.

Most comments were pretty much along the line of "That's an unreasonable amount of time for a boss in any game." But I did read a few comments from wow raiders. I saw a few saying things like "Oh my guild raids 8 hours a night every night and we kill Illidan and blah blah I like dicks." Most of them didn't say "I like dicks" but I usually think that it's implied when you write crap like that. Then again, I'd say that would be more insulting to Homosexuals. First off the comparisson between games isn't even close. It's like comparing assholes and oranges. Secondly, You don't fight Illidan for 8 hours straight. If you did, then you'd be called a retard.

And I'm spent for this rant.

World of Lovecraft

As I sit here clicking on people's names in this little grid box and pressing 2 on my keyboard, I begin to slip into the stream of World of Warcraft subconscious and ponder philosophical meanings of things related to WoW.

I'ma castin mah healan!

I'm a healer. DUH. It's like the Mystery Men movie. I'd be like the shoveler except it's like. "I'm the healer. I heal well." I got my priest, pally, druid, shaman all capable of healing specs. Granted the priest and pally are well more geared for it, but they're all gee too gee. Some people out there might be thinking, "WTF is wrong with this guy? Who the hell likes to not kill things and do big damage. Healing?! How boring is that. NOOB." And to those people, I'll remember that. When i'm not healing you and letting you get a 50g repair bill. OHhh not doing so great DPS when you're dead now are you? Or maybe I'll let you sit at about 10% and let you crap your pants and listen to your feeble pleas for salvation by my GLORIOUS HEALS! BUWAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA!!!! TEH POWAH! TEEEHHH POOOWWWAAAAHHHHHRRRRRARGBALLALLFALFJDJFKLA!!!!

Make love, not warcraft

I thought about this one time. When i was screaming on vent solo healing a tank during some 40 man. Might have been MC, when all the healers ate shit and died and I was the lone gunman. The tank was a little disturbed afterwards. The dialouge went something like this.

Raid Leader: Crap. Holy, you're the only healer left. Keep the tank up and lets burn it down.
Me: OHHHH YEEAAAAHHHHH! LETS DO DIS!!! YOU LIKE DAT! YOU LIKE DAT!?!?!?!?!
(Then i stand up and start doing hip thrusts while healing the tank)
Me: YOU TAKE THAT HEAL! AWWW HERE COMES A BIG ONE! BOOOOOM!!!!!
Raid Warning: Boss Dead
RL: I can't belive that just fucking happened.
Tank:Please... don't do that again...
Me: Was that as good for you as it was for me?
Tank: *cries*

Boy, I needed a cigarette after that one. But this leads to my theory of the nature of healing is. It's more like "sexual healing." Sexual... HEALING BABY! Erhm. What are you doing when you're "healing" someone? You're bringing life back into them. Oh come on. You don't really think that just changing some biblical bullshit or throwing leaves actually does anything. You gotta keep that green bar up. And keep it up as long as you can. Boy... This makes healing pretty gay sounding. Unless your tank is female then it's AWWWWW YEAHHHHH. Or if you're the tank and your healer is female.... AWWWW YEAHHHH. We need more womens as tanks. Or healers. Or both. AWWWWWW YEEAAHHHHHHHH.

Me Heal You Long Time

Which then makes you think. Boy, us healers are whores. Everyone's looking for our "special services" and every group needs one. And those of us that are more... "experienced" tend to have a client list of people who like us healing them. The crappy ones are just doing it wrong. Hmmmm. Healers are prostitutes... Yeyah. I'm gonna make a guild comprised entirely of healers. And I'll be the pimp. Be like, "BITCH! What's your +Healing at?!" I could pimp out my guildies for gold. It's like, HEY! You aint at quota. Is Holynub gonna have to choke a druid?! Ahhh... That would be amazing if that actually worked.

LFM Kara Orgey

This makes every raid/instance a big orgey. Think about THAT next time you run Kara. You know that sticky feeling you get when you have a HoT on you. Yeah.. It's what you think it is. I hope you all enjoyed this demented view of WoW. This is what Holy thinks about when he's clicking on grid and healing everyone.

I AM NUB!(Wow rant)

So... I've had this thing up for a while. Haven't done a WoW post yet. Amazing. I r did a good job. BUT NOT FOR LONG!

If there's anyone that I don't know that's reading this, I play a NE priest named Holynub on Dragonblight(US) server. And I die alot. That is all. But nawwww, I r good playar.

Anyway, a canadian eh dude I know started doing a pug Hyjal a couple weeks ago. I've got minimal experience doing Hyjal. Prior I've only gone up to Anatheron and wiped on him because retards don't know how to run to the tank when they have an infernal on them. ANYWAY, so I went yesterday to see all the hubbub was about. First time i've raided on my priest in a couple months already. And it got me to thinking. Boy I love my priest.

STFU L2P

There are lots of priest cry babies online. Check the forums and you'll find all of them. Wahhhh my healing sucks. Wahh druids are better at pvp than we are. Wahhh my DPS sucks. Wahhh I specced for lightwell. Jesus. Just because we're not OP, people turn into blubbering dumbasses. Me, I like playing my priest. I can DPS, I can heal, I can tank people. I don't mind some of the weaknesses, because there are still lots of strengths. Playing a priest, it make-a me feel gewd.

OH GOD! OH GOD! SHIYAT!! I GOT AGGRO!

That be my most common phrase I say when I go shadow. No, it's not because I do lots of damage. It's because I'm a retard and I start mah pew pew waaaaaayyyyy too early. Ask my brother Kek. He'll tell ya. You know what... I take that back. That's probably the only thing i say when I'm in a group. Now that I think about it... I pull a lot of aggro. YESSSSS. I don't know why. That makes me happy. Fade? What is this "fade" you speak of? Shush! It dosn't exist! I didn't train it! I didn't spec for it.


Holynub, the other other white meat

For anyone who has raided with me, you all know I die alot. Ohhh back in the day, back when Molten Core was serious business. That was where the Holy legacy was made. Those goddamn Lava Packs. Here's an exerpt of some of the vent conversations.

...
(Raid Leader): Lets pull the lava packs. Going.
(2 secs later)
(Me): Oh crap.
(Raid Warning): Holynub has died
(Me): Using Soul Stone, I'm up.
(3 secs later)
(Me): OH GOD THE FIRE!
(Raid Warning): Holynub has died
(Raid Leader): Holy's dead, get a battle rez him
(Me): Thanks (druid name)
(3 secs later)
(Me):WOOOHHHHH!!!!
(Raid Leader):Oh goddamnit.
(Raid Warning): Holynub has died
(Raid Leader):Battle rez him
(Me): Oh please no...
...

Man, that was back before they added rez timers. Those were dark times. And by dark, I mean expensive.

Games that are like other games but not... what?

Ever find yourself playing a game, and suddenly get this feeling of deja vu? I have. I'm sure you might have as well. There are just so many different games out there now, many of them begin to blend together. A professor of mine once told me "Good imitation is better than bad innovation." I'm going to have to agree. I'd rather play a game that is done well but done before, than play a crappy game that's "innovative." I'm not saying innovation is bad. Hell, most of the legendary games of our time all started as great innovations. It is their successors and mimics that reflect the strength of that innovation. Granted, some do the imitation better than others. I thought it would be nice to reflect on some of those games that were like this other game but not really.

"I'm the dude playing the dude disguised as another dude!" - Kirk Lazarus(Tropic Thunder)


Uncharted:Drake's Fortune(PS3) :: It's Tomb Raider... With a dude...



Yeah... That's pretty much what this game is. Blah blah shaddap. It's Tomb Raider, but you don't have a hawt busty woman to gawk at. You still raid tombs, solve puzzles, shoot guns, discover ancient civilization secrets that might DESTROY THE WORLD. Maybe they should have made the title "Tomb Raider for women." (sexist rant removed)


Mystic Heroes(Gamecube/PS2):: It's Dyanasty Warriors... For kids...


Ok, this one is pretty goddamn obvious. The both games are made by Koei, WTF do you expect? Seems like that's the only game they're capable of creating. You fight off massive amounts of enemies, do special kill thingamajiggers that aren't musou powers. You run, you hack, you slash, you kill, you repeat. And this leads us too...


Ninety Nine Nights(360):: It's like Dynasty Warriors... Minus the China...

Oh come on Microsoft. I know this was one of your launch titles. But naw, you totally ripped off the Dynasty Warriors franchise. Did you really have to release this game? I mean, they did make Dynasty Warriors 5 Empires and Dynasty Warriors 6 for your system. Why you gotta be lika dat?


Splinter Cell series(Cross Platform):: It's like Metal Gear... Minus the Japanese.


Ohh Tom Clancy. You sneaky sneaky man. Look at these games. Before any of you start saying "Goddamnit holy, they are totally different." I ask you. What is in common with these two games? What is the primary reason you play these two games? You sneak. And do stuff. Then you sneak some more. And then you do stuff. You silently kill people. Then do stuff. Wait wait, there's a convoluted storyline that has more twists and turns than my lower intestine. Yeah... They're the same.


Snood(PC/DS):: It's like Bust-A-Move... For retards.


What is this? WHAT IS THIS?! I thought, you can't rip off a puzzle game. Because it's blatantly fucking obvious that you're playing the same goddamn thing! But this game... Yeah, they did it.


Heavenly Sword(PS3):: It's like God of War... But with a chick.


You know. Some games actually do it right. You have to admit, Heavenly Sword was a nice looking God of War ripoff game. Played pretty well. Excellent graphics. And, as long as you turn off the dumbass sixaxis control, it's playable. Well met.(insert golf clap here)


Ghost Rider(PS2):: It's like God of War... But with more Nicholas Cage.


Now, as far as movie games go, this one isn't THAT bad. I mean, if you're going to rip off a game's play style to help sell a movie game, you might as well rip off a good one. Though the game almost totally deviated from the movie minus the whole Nicholas Cage. Actually... If the movie had the story of the game, I think it would've been better. But not really.


Puzzle Quest(Cross Platform):: It's like Bejeweled... Smashed together with Dungeons & Dragons.


Now this is how you rip off a puzzle game. These guys at Infinite Interactive, so clever. They
took two games, from different polarities, and smashed them together. What's even better, they did it well. It's BRILLIANT! They simultaneously hit two different genre demographics at the SAME TIME. Man, whoever was smoking pot while thinking this one up, needs more weed.


Scarface(PS2/Xbox):: It's like Grand Theft Auto:Vice City... But with more Tony Montana meng.


Hokay meng, you wanna play some game? We play some game. But nawwwww, this game is just like GTA:Vice City. Except you play as Tony Montana. Who didn't die from being shot a billion times. It wasn't bad. Just... Wasn't much different.


Mercenaries(PS2/Xbox):: It's like Grand Theft Auto... North Korea.


Lets go through the check list. Open environment. Check. Mission based system. Check. Run people over with vehicles you stole from them. Check. Lack of morals. Check. Same game. Half check. This game clearly builds upon a lot of what the GTA series is known for, but it adds it's own little... Something. Rather than be punished for destroying public property, it rewards you with monies! Which you use to destroy more property. And so on. Probably one of my favorite game clones.


That is about all I can think of right now. There's probably more games out there. But I can't remember them right now. So You might see me post more of these.